Untitled [abused]

She sits
up in her little room,
silently rocking back and forth.

A scream,
then the sound of shattering glass...

She just doesn't understand...
Why did they do this?
Day in.
Day out.

So many questions...

School didn't help,
thye just thought she had problems,
that she was a troubled child.

They did tests on her,
like some kind of lab rat.

They didn't understand,
They couldn't.
They didn't know,
Didn't hear...
Didn't feel
What she did everyday.

How could they?

She pushes herself up,
off of her bed,
and walks towards to window.
She throws it open,
Enjoying the cool night breeze
On her flushed cheeks.

Leaning forward,
She takes a deep breath.
Upon hear another scream,
and the sound of an unconcious body hitting the floor,
She lets herself
....................f
...............a
..........l
..l

[writers block]

The white page stares up at her,
taunting her with invisible eyes.
How she had pictured herself,
Words flowing onto the white paper,
pages filling up within seconds...
How that memory seemed so distant,
so faded..
She closed the notebook
and glared at the spiral spine,
the emerald green cover.
How dare it taunt her,
make a fool out of her.

sEcOnD cHaNcEs

A pang of hatred,
mixed with longing
hits you
as he walks by.
You try to think of something
brilliant to say,
to make his amazing self turn.

What had happened over the summer?
You felt so close,
so good with him,
yet you pulled away.
Your fingers brush your cheek,
the same way his breath did.

He had caught you alone,
gathering your books,
and cornered you.
He whispered just what you wanted to hear,
and you..

You pulled away.
Throwing excuses at him,
Yet begging for forgiveness at the same time.
And now you sit,
Wondering why you pulled away,
and wonder if you'll ever have a second chance.

Slow death

The room swims in front of you.
You feel odd.
As if you are floating.
Your breath comes in
short gasps.
You exhale too quickly.
Something is wrong.
The room is spinning.
You can't breathe.
You struggle.
Everything seems so slow.
You begin to panic.
Your heart beats faster.
Blood is pounding in your ears.
Colours swirl.
Red.
Black.
Gray.
Spinning.
Falling.
Nothing.

Dreams..

I remember having a dream, a long time ago. It was beautiful and vivid...I'm amazed that I even remember it after all this time.

A small elf girl, her ears delicately pointed, is running though a forest. She is smiling about something, and as she runs, her long brown hair flows outwards behind her. She stops, hiding behind a small tree, resting her forehead on the cool, smooth bark that has yet to roughen and split.

A boy, elfin being his heritage as well, is searching for her. He calls out her name, his young voice piping and sweet. "Celest! Come to me now! Your mother nor your father would approve of you coming to this unholy place. Please do not tell me your sweet soul hath forgetten the terrible misfortunes that ocurred here..Let us be homeward now!"

She moves from her place, and hair falls over her eyes. It hides her shame which shows prominently in her gray eyes. "I am sorry.." She falters, the terrible memories flooding her mind.

The day the daemons had come had been beautiful. The violet sky had been crisp and clear, without a dark cloud marring its smooth appearance. By noon though, the black drums began to beat. Disturbances of other villages was not unheard of, and they were far away, very distant, so the village thought nothing of it.
When the hordes came, it was like a black flood had covered the entire village. They swarmed into cottages, ripping the innocent souls from battered and destroyed bodies. Battle went on for many suns and moons, for escape was prevented. Battle had to be won or lost. The drums stopped beating. Yet many lives had been lost and still the search continued for the blackened soul stones of friends and family.

She shakes her head. "Yes, I'm sorry...Let us leave this terrible place..." She whispers. She keeps her eyes downcast as she follows the young boy home.

YoU kNoW...

You know, in some cases teen life can be pretty hard. There are a lot of things to juggle, like school, work, boyfriends, girlfriends, and sometimes it just gets too much to bear. So you let yourself loose for a couple of days. But, when you come back to it all, there’s even more, in less time to do it in. So what if I left it all behind? I wouldn’t work in an office, but that’s not a problem for me. Who would want to sit behind a computer for hours on end, doing something that you don’t like, with MSN sitting so close? Not me. As for the government, would they really care if one more child went out onto the street? They’re not doing much about the ones who are out there now, so I doubt it.

Why, you might ask, am I even considering something like this? My mind likes to wander...Why shouldn’t I think about it? Because it’s against the rules? Because I have this great life, right? A lot better than most peoples'. So am I being selfish for wanting freedom then? Should I just be thankful and shut up, and continue to live the life I have?

The key thing is, I don’t want my wonderful life anymore. I want to feel the harshness of the real world, want to know what it’s like. In my view, giving up my life and trading it for another’s, who is less fortunate, is a good thing. Let them have a better life than me. Does that still make me selfish?

Anguish

All you ever wanted
Was for this to be true,
But then I went
And turned it around on you.

Now I sit here
All alone and scared,
Please come to help me
For I have become impaired.

I fall and as I fell
I saw the faces of those,
Those I hurt and who hurt me
And who were my foes.

I have seen
Those I love be taken.
Torn from my grasp
It seems I am forsaken.

Sitting apart
I stare with empty eyes.
Blinded by false hopes
Trapped in lies.

Pushed away
By those I thought were real,
I found out too late
What's its like to feel.

Never-ending pain
It has been my curse.
I will take one final rest,
Buried deep within the earth...

I never realized
How hard this would be.
So I state one final goodbye
I don't expect you to see.

The reason behind these marks
Is for me to know.
I'm sorry for all I've done
Now I will go...

The blood flows freely now
The end is drawing near,
This causes no extra pain
So you need not fear.