alwaysalways

I want to be beautiful for you
but there's all this in the way

No one ever listens anymore

I told you to make me jealous
not to break my heart

"I'm sorry" is the most pathetic excuse for a bandaid ever and a few drinks would work much, much better

no
you are too sweet to love me
yes
I am too bitter to love
maybe
I'll let you down easy
but yes
your heart will break
and no
you'll never trust a girl again

good god, I'm angry

do not ever doubt my power
I can wrap myself around one
and have them wrapped around my little finger
in less time than you'd ever believe
I can steal him away from you
have him give me everything he never gave you
and have him say everything you ever wanted him to say
so fuck off bitch

What a phrase forever is

all I ever did was love you
and all you ever did was save my life
all you ever said was forever
and now all I know is that you lied

it feels like this

up
up
and away
the picture perfect balloon girl
floating away into the clouds

too many thoughts about nothing

I hate the tippity-tappity thoughts
the ones that yell
unclean unsafe don't touch
and ask me if I can remember a time
when they weren't bouncing around
this full-of-empty head of mine

true

it's her name on your lips,
but mine in your thoughts.

It's all you ever do!

I think I miss you
until
we talk
or rather
you preen and let praise of yourself
drip drip drip
off your tongue

This is why I keep it all to myself and the pages before me

and I could let what's in my heart
                                                                                  out
but
who would be there just to listen
and not top the secret with their own?

I hate this cycle

I forget what full feels like
so I panic
grabbing, hoarding, consuming
and then I remember
and regret

desire of you

I really just want you to touch me
to hold me closer than others have,
and whisper exactly what they did into my ear
when you reach the point where you think you love me

Self centred people pleaser

you are too concerned with being the guy everyone loves
you need to spend more time
trying to be the guy that everyone likes first

If I could time travel, guess what I would never let happen?

when I've kissed the last set of lips goodbye
whose arms will find me next?
I've lost you so many times
Found you, loved you
and watched you disappear
again and again
I'm used to your habits
They are my own
We are the perfect match
that could never be
two ghosts
pitiful
and afraid that what we could have
will be nothing compared to what we did
will be nothing compared to what we already let go
I run away
Leap into the next bed
and always end up seeking you out
consoled by the familiarity
and knowing that I can only have you
for a little while
and that's okay
until I start to miss you

It's pathetic how often I check my phone

Recieved
1 Message
and I day dream
that it's from you
and I know
that it won't be

fickle hearts and melodies

I'm sorry
you waited too long
to play your love song for me
I heard another melody
followed it
and found another who played a better one